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Sprite Wars

This Is Your Captain Speaking...

Commander Evil

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Gentlemen, the purpose of this thread is to create hilarious dialog between this immense ship's captain and crew, and the probably googleplex of people aboard. I shall start...


'this is your captain speaking, to the people in deck 4302472395819283098, please stop hucking nukes at one another before i have you all blown into deep space, thats right, all 3 trillion of you'

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You guys are really startin to piss me off. Also, Deck 32, call off the war with Deck 99999993423423, you aint gonna get there THIS generation.


Deck 4417, stop screwing drainpipes, your messiah DEFINATELY didnt do that. Also, somebody tell the cultists in deck 57449398 to stop digging into the bulkeads, geeze you people are gonna give me an ULCER!

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Aw hell, somebody get those pre-sentient subhumans out of the air ducts, we're getting complaints that the smoke from their campfires is starting to irritate other decks.


Also, whoever stole the artifact from deck 1232's shrine, please return it. It isn't funny, seriously.


Deck 487, i UNDERSTAND that you don't appreciate 488 massing armored companies on your borders, but you can rest assured that if they try anything, we'll vent their atmosphere as punishment.

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